When a little and a caretaker reach a point in their relationship where they move in together, and they decide upon a set of rules as common ground, this typically results in a set of ideas and goals I'm going to set forth as a baseline for the rest of the advice in this passage.
- The little will be diapered a majority of the time, perhaps 24/7, but at least at all times while home
- The little has a job
- Babying and caretaking is important to both the little and the caretaker as a daily requirement for happy home life
- The caretaker is not a switch
It's important to start off by stating that there needs to be a mutual understanding between the caretaker and the little that you are both adults, you both have needs as adults, and everything should be considered in that context, and not a fictional one imposed atop that. What I mean by that is no matter what roleplaying has happened in the past or in the future, you are in a real relationship with a human who (clearly) likes you a good deal. You should treat them as they are as a person, not what you may have previously, or during an RP, fantasized.
That being said, as a person, a little is a complicated being. They have little interests and needs, while also being beholden to adult expectations and responsibilities. It's a careful line to tow in order to answer all these needs effectively and maturely as a caretaker, and it's definitely not for everyone.
As a caretaker, in order to effectively handle someone in this middle ground, you need to be understanding first, and accommodating in response. It's your responsibility to hit all the key points I outlined.
The binge and purge cycle that is so often talked about in the community as a 'given' is the result of littles and diapering being made taboo, not only in public, but in the home as well. The reality is that for some individuals, diapers, and the needs of a little, are requirements for some. Ignoring, or pretending these attributes don't exist or are wrong, creates a climate where a little feels uncomfortable with themselves, and who they are as a person.
It is important that a caretaker facilitates an environment at home where the creation of that taboo is not allowed. You must make it normal for the little to be allowed to express themselves, or this will create problems in the long term for mental health in the home. Dialog about diaper status, dressing, changing should be allowed to intertwine freely with conversation about friends, work, interests, news, and entertainment. The onus is on the caretaker to provide this environment.
Given the above, there should be a spoken and unspoken understanding at all times that because the environment is as free and open as necessary, there are expectations placed on the little one. The little one should be nearly always diapered, and have rules associated with said diapers. The little should be expected to have a reasonable amount of structure in home life as a child would. You can have the most caring and loving environment, but what's the point if you don't use it as intended (much like diapers :^) ).
Note that none of these requirements are fantastical in nature. Rules should be designed to act as guides and helpers in realizing the full potential and interest of the caretaker/little dynamic, not designed to milk it for all it's worth. You are not turning the little into what you want the little to be, you are allowing the little to flourish as they truly wish to.
In summarization of this bizarre rant, as a caretaker you need to:
- Facilitate an environment where being a little is commonplace
- Normalize speech and discourse in the household to reflect this environment
- Create structure in the household that, rather than being binding, is freeing to the little's personality and interests